Original Release: JD Software, 1993, PC
An obscure indie shareware release that actually plays a simple but decent game of casual poker
Alien Poker (PC, JD Software, 1993)
Where to Buy: Shareware, download from Internet Archive
How to Emulate: MS-DOS Emulation Guide
Review by: C. M0use
Hiding behind the weird and cutesy exterior is actually a basic but solid game of poker that’s really well-suited to newcomers learning the game.
The only version of poker on offer is basic five-card draw, but one in which there’s a mandatory immediate ante and at least one player must bet on their initial hand or everyone gets five new cards and is forced to ante again (not sure what this version is called). Every game is a custom one-off game that you set up by picking from five alien/robot opponents, and you can set the win condition up to just one person being eliminated.
A “look” option at the main menu gives you a bio of each of the alien weirdos you can play against, and they each do have a play style that reflects their personalities. The robot who’s basically the ultimate online poker nit will usually sit on the nuts and fold if he doesn’t have anything, but will sometimes clumsily bluff big if you’ve been showing weakness by folding a lot. The squirrely Bignose usually plays it cautious but randomly makes attempts to bluff with a pair or ace high. It never feels particularly intelligent, but it’s at least as good as most commercial poker games from decades later and it does add some variety and unpredictability.
On the personality front, each character also has a pretty broad range of win and loss quotes that are actually fairly impressive about being tied to the circumstances. You only get the quotes if there’s some substantial action and they often reflect the specific situation, like an alien musing “I thought I was bluffing” when managing to win with a pair of sixes.
The slow and deliberate pace might irk some people who are used to twitchy online poker, but it’s perfect for people just learning the game and wanting to take their time absorbing and considering everything. It’s definitely too basic and lacking in options for even intermediate players, but I still think it could work as a good little Solitaire-type timekiller for the more experienced, it’s extremely small and lightweight and can be emulated on just about anything.
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